I've been checking things off on my to-do list, and man, does it feel good. I think I'm even past the halfway mark.
Not sleeping oh so much, and approaching day three of pizza and beer and chocolate standing in for life force, but hey, it's working...
What is it about crappy food and malt beverages that makes life seem so much simpler and more manageable?
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Monday, March 3, 2008
Weather, I love you
When things seemed the crappiest and least bearable yet, the sun came out, I drank coffee and worked (was productive!) and the snow started to melt. Funny how life seems so much better when things are melting.
(Winter is not my friend.)
(Winter is not my friend.)
Meme Time
I've been tagged by Emeline of Cochonet Rouge, and where she expressed concerns of blog loser-dom over only knowing five bloggers, I have to admit that the only blogger I know other than myself is Emeline (being new to the scene and all... heh...). So no links for you, Internet! I'm the end of the line!
7 Strange factoids about me:
1. My original plan for life was to become a neuroscientist.
2. I recently learned that my inability to add and subtract without counting on my fingers while being at the same time quite genius at complex math is a named condition: dyscalculia (While not all of these attributes apply to me, many of them are surprisingly spot on. Who knew that I naturally suck at paying bills?)
3. I am extremely (and irrationally) embarassed by exercise. Extremely. ie. I looked up a basic yoga how-to on the internet and tried it out in my bedroom, and when my partner/husband-man walked in I jumped up, shooed him away, and couldn't relax enough to start again until I was confident that he was occupied in another room.
4. I was "diagnosed" with Oppositional Defiant Disorder in junior high. (Later, I read up on the "condition" and determined that it was in fact a misdiagnosis, but the title still amuses me today)
5. I was vehemently anti-child until I was hit with a sudden surge of baby fever, and I've never gone back (heh...)
6. I'm an athiest (well, at least mostly an athiest... I lack conviction as well as faith), but I believe in horoscopes as if they're hard facts or universal truths.
7. I am terribly (and tragically) allergic to cumin.
“7 Things” Meme How To:
1. Link to your tagger and post these rules.
2. Share 7 random facts about yourself
3. Tag 5 people at the end of your post and list their names (linking to them).
4. Let them know they’ve been tagged by leaving a comment at their Blogs
5. Have fun!
7 Strange factoids about me:
1. My original plan for life was to become a neuroscientist.
2. I recently learned that my inability to add and subtract without counting on my fingers while being at the same time quite genius at complex math is a named condition: dyscalculia (While not all of these attributes apply to me, many of them are surprisingly spot on. Who knew that I naturally suck at paying bills?)
3. I am extremely (and irrationally) embarassed by exercise. Extremely. ie. I looked up a basic yoga how-to on the internet and tried it out in my bedroom, and when my partner/husband-man walked in I jumped up, shooed him away, and couldn't relax enough to start again until I was confident that he was occupied in another room.
4. I was "diagnosed" with Oppositional Defiant Disorder in junior high. (Later, I read up on the "condition" and determined that it was in fact a misdiagnosis, but the title still amuses me today)
5. I was vehemently anti-child until I was hit with a sudden surge of baby fever, and I've never gone back (heh...)
6. I'm an athiest (well, at least mostly an athiest... I lack conviction as well as faith), but I believe in horoscopes as if they're hard facts or universal truths.
7. I am terribly (and tragically) allergic to cumin.
“7 Things” Meme How To:
1. Link to your tagger and post these rules.
2. Share 7 random facts about yourself
3. Tag 5 people at the end of your post and list their names (linking to them).
4. Let them know they’ve been tagged by leaving a comment at their Blogs
5. Have fun!
Sunday, March 2, 2008
This afternoon, as I was putting Boy 1.0 down for a nap, I thought about the way that I should probably feel satisfied with myself for undertaking the heroic effort of caring for two small children full time, and yet I can't put down the idea that I should be doing something more. Like I should Make Something Of Myself. That making a home and caring for children is somehow Not Enough. That this isn't the Real World, and that I need to Take On More.
Even as I write this, the pre-children Self in me is saying "I don't get it! What's so hard about that? She SHOULD be making something more of herself! Get on it, let's go!"
And the Self with two children says, "I am soooooo tired, all I want is to lay in this bed, and kiss this baby, and soon it will be time to cook something for dinner, and I will do my best to include a variety of wholesome foods, and then I will attempt (without real success) to clean up my kitchen, and hang the diapers to dry on the rack, and put the toddler to bed, and then I can relax."
And then the Other Self pipes up and says, "Oh, no you don't. I know about that stack of unfinished assignments. I know about that closet that has been filling and filling, to the point that you can't let go of the doorknob when it's opened or the contents pressing against the door will force themselves out. I know about those bills waiting to be paid and the mess inside your desk drawers. I know about that stuff, Mother Self. No rest for you!"
Even as I write this, the pre-children Self in me is saying "I don't get it! What's so hard about that? She SHOULD be making something more of herself! Get on it, let's go!"
And the Self with two children says, "I am soooooo tired, all I want is to lay in this bed, and kiss this baby, and soon it will be time to cook something for dinner, and I will do my best to include a variety of wholesome foods, and then I will attempt (without real success) to clean up my kitchen, and hang the diapers to dry on the rack, and put the toddler to bed, and then I can relax."
And then the Other Self pipes up and says, "Oh, no you don't. I know about that stack of unfinished assignments. I know about that closet that has been filling and filling, to the point that you can't let go of the doorknob when it's opened or the contents pressing against the door will force themselves out. I know about those bills waiting to be paid and the mess inside your desk drawers. I know about that stuff, Mother Self. No rest for you!"
Way back when, this kind of sleep-avoidance was commonplace. There was a time when I slept every second night. I accomplished very little, and learned even less, because my mind was addled by fatigue and various narcotics and caffeine.
Well, that time is gone. The best I've done lately is purchase White Zinfandel and Rescue Remedy, mix the two together and sip optimistically while eating colour-matched pairs of Spring-themed M&Ms.
The to-do list is seemingly insurmountable... time's a-ticking, and there are two babies sleeping nearby and a mother who is living three lives at once. (Okay... only two. I was exaggerating.)
Mama meets teenage malcontented sleepwalker-girl.
Or something. Mama meets heroic adventurer. Mama meets
suited, respectable dream-man. Mama meets aspiring
novelist. Mama meets truly employable human being.
Mama meets non-mama. Mama meets ______. A bird on the wire.
Well, that time is gone. The best I've done lately is purchase White Zinfandel and Rescue Remedy, mix the two together and sip optimistically while eating colour-matched pairs of Spring-themed M&Ms.
The to-do list is seemingly insurmountable... time's a-ticking, and there are two babies sleeping nearby and a mother who is living three lives at once. (Okay... only two. I was exaggerating.)
Mama meets teenage malcontented sleepwalker-girl.
Or something. Mama meets heroic adventurer. Mama meets
suited, respectable dream-man. Mama meets aspiring
novelist. Mama meets truly employable human being.
Mama meets non-mama. Mama meets ______. A bird on the wire.
The Beginning
I'm starting a blog on a whim. I'm going to post my thoughts, ideas, aspirations and defeats on this blog. There is a lot on my mind, and I want somewhere else to put it.
I figure that if I gain a cult following, I can add it to my list of "completed tasks" or "accomplishments" or "significant contributions" or what have you. It's either this or all the things I actually have to do... and oh, Internet, you're the salve on my spirit when I run out of life force to complete scheduled tasks.
Welcome to my blog, world. Hello, Internet.
I figure that if I gain a cult following, I can add it to my list of "completed tasks" or "accomplishments" or "significant contributions" or what have you. It's either this or all the things I actually have to do... and oh, Internet, you're the salve on my spirit when I run out of life force to complete scheduled tasks.
Welcome to my blog, world. Hello, Internet.
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